You can Steal my Wallet, but you can't Steal Me!

STARRING Flippy Giggles

FEATURING Lifty n’ Shifty, Handy, Sniffles, Toothy, Pop n’ Cub

Lifty and Shifty were currently chuckling to themselves as they ran through the woods. As they ran you could hear various snaps and whips go off behind them, signalling that booby traps were being set off behind them. After a bit of running they cleared the woods and found a preplanned trap. Both of them suddenly stood still and waved the stolen wallets up in the air. Flippy and Giggles came running out of the woods after them, but right before they caught the raccoons they both suddenly fell down into a cellar. Acting quickly, Shifty put a padlock on the door and started walking away, both of them cheered out in victory as their voices got quieter.

Flippy woke up in a dark concrete box. The first thing that caught his attention were the bars separating him from the light outside. He ran up to the bars and grabbed onto them. “IS ANYONE OUT THERE! HELP ME! I’M TRAPPED!” He called out to no one, it was pretty apparent to him how isolated they were. He let out a sigh as he lowered his head in defeat, but then he heard some whimpering coming from the dark box. He descended back in and lit his lighter for some light. He followed the noise and found Giggles lying in a pool of blood with her leg very broken and actively bleeding. As Flippy got closer he could hear what she was whimpering. “I don’t wanna die… please… Momma…” As he listened, he stopped hearing Giggles voice, but he kept hearing the voices. “I DONT WANNA DIE!! THE PAIN! IT HURTSSS” “WHERE’S MY LEG!”. He started breathing heavily, he looked in horror at Giggles struggle. His eyes went yellow and he suddenly let out a growl. “SOLDIER! STAY WITH ME AND CALM DOWN! WHERES YOUR BANDAGES?!?” Giggles yelped out as she turned to Fliqpy. “Wh-what do you-.” “Ah you recruits and your lack of preparation!” He reaches into his pack and pulls out a bandage, wrapping it tight around Giggles to slow her blood loss.

Giggles grits her teeth and grunts in pain, but when he was done she noticed that it was so tight that her leg was staying straight. She turned over and saw Fliqpy run around and find a rock. He ran up to the bar doors and started bashing the lock with the rock, over and over again as hard as he could. He actually managed to do some damage, but eventually the rock broke into tiny pieces and fell to the ground. He growled as he looked around He sighed as he pulled his knife out of its holster. He lined up the butt of the knife and smashed it into the lock, shattering it off as they were now free. Fliqpy runs back over to Giggles and lofts her up over his soldier. “Hang in there son, You ain’t dyin on me today!” He was putting on a much grumpier and straight to the point voice, much like an actual army sergeant. He then ran Giggles out of the cell and ran around, looking for the nearest hospital.

Handy walked up to the desk of the hospital and waited for Sniffles, the worker at the desk, to notice him. After a minute of typing on the computer Sniffles gave his attention to Handy. “Hello sir! How can I help you today?” Handy put on a friendly smile. “Hello! It’s Handy! I’m scheduled for the experimental surgery with doctor Toothy!” Sniffles looked down at the computer and smiled. “Indeed you are! Stay here for a mo-.” The door suddenly burst open as Fliqpy charged inside. “I NEED A MEDIC!” He runs up to the counter and pushes Handy aside. Sniffles was definitely surprised and a little worried, but he got a bit annoyed. “Sir you can’t just barge in and-.” Fliqpy grabs Sniffles with an iron tight grasp, lifting him partially up onto the counter. “EVERY MOMENT YOU WASTE LOWERS THEIR CHANCE OF SURVIVAL! NOW GET ME A DAMN MEDIC YOU MUTT!” He drops Sniffles but eyes him down. Handy pokes Fliqpy on the shoulder. “Could you please calm-.” Fliqpy, with one arm, grabbed Handy’s collar and smashed his face into the desk, crushing it in a bit before he kicked off Handy’s hard hat with his foot. He slid the hats top onto Handy’s face before stomping it down, quickly caving in Handy’s skull and murdering the fuck out of him. With Sniffles continuing to do nothing but sit there in freeze mode, it finally ticked Fliqpy over the edge. Fliqpy hops the counter and grabs Sniffle’s trunk. He pulls it up really hard until the hand that was holding up Giggles could grab it, and then he smashed Sniffle’s face into the computer on the desk, frying his face and cutting him up really badly with all the glass, disposing of him very quickly. Fliqpy grunts and turns to the hallway with activity, charging down until he bumped into Toothy. Fliqpy grabs Toothy’s hand as Toothy was headed to the front desk. “She’s bleeding out! She needs a medic stat! Get her in a room!” Toothy was bewildered and very shaken up, but he took a good look at Giggles who was decently pale now and still very clearly had a pretty bad break in her leg. Toothy looked around for a bit, but then Fliqpy pulled a knife and held it to his neck. “I SAID GET HER A ROOM!” Toothy backs up and then quickly fumbles with the knob to the room he was just in. “O-oh yes! I I! Uhm! Bring her in here!” He really struggled to open the door, but he managed to open it up to a room with two stations for hurt people. One of the beds was occupied by Cub who had a big bump on his forehead and Pop was out cold reading the newspaper on a chair beside Cub. Fliqpy carried Giggles to the bed and laid her down, turning to the doctor. “I still have a mission to complete, make sure she lives to fight another day.” And with that, before Toothy could ask him a single question, Fliqpy was gone.

—–

Lifty and Shifty were at the bank making a deposit of some cash, they looked at each other and chuckled as they walked out, finally having completed a good ol ‘grubbing. They stepped out and saw a small pile of cash right next to the alley. They both looked at each other and then made a dash to see who could grab the cash first. Lifty managed to pull ahead of Shifty and dove onto the cash to shuffle it all into himself, but he suddenly screamed out in pain as tons of thumbtacks that were hidden within the bit of cash all stabbed into his belly. He shook around in pain as blood quickly seeped from his belly, but Shifty was more interested in the cash. He carefully picked around his brother for as many dollar bills as he could grab, but with his guard completely down, he was suddenly struck in the back of the head with a pipe. His face smacked into the brick wall of one of the buildings surrounding the back alley and before he could recoup himself he felt a tight grip on the back of his neck. Fliqpy grabbed him and threw him at a dumpster, sending him face first into the metal wall of its side. He broke his nose as evident from the amount of blood that started gushing out of his face, but that was the least of his concern as he watched Fliqpy walk up to him. He grabbed Shifty’s collar and lifted him off the ground, he swung the dumpster lid up, placed his head right on the edge of the dumpster, and held him still as the dumpster lid crushed his skull to a pulp. He let go of Shifty and his mostly decapitated body fell to the floor as he walked back over to Lifty Lifty was still squirming around in pain from all the thumbtacks in his stomach, and Fliqpy had an idea on how to relieve it. He takes a knee beside Lifty and picks up some unused thumbtacks, making sure to poke them in some veins that would really bleed. Lifty cried out in pain, but that pain quickly turned to a plea as Fliqpy grabbed his legs and lifted him off the ground. Fliqpy walked him over to a solid wall and lined up the front of his body with the wall. He charged up Lifty like a baseball back and then slammed him into the wall, driving all the thumbtacks deeper into his flesh. He repeated the wall smash another 2 times before he dropped Lifty on the ground. To finish off the kill he grabbed a thumbtack and drove it deep into Lifty’s neck and then used it to slice open his whole neck, which quickly finished the job on ending his life.

Fliqpy pants a bit from exertion as he looks around the alley, but quickly he’d calm down from his PTSD induced state as he walked out of the alley. The end